Want Nothing Time | Day 14 – 30 Days to TYP

30 Days to Transform Your Play - Day 14 - Want Nothing Time {from An Everyday Story}

30 Days to Transform Your Play - Day 14 Want Nothing Time {An Everyday Story}Day 14 in our 30 Days to Transform Your Play series and it’s a good one! Today’s topic is something that is very dear to my heart, something that is so simple but can have an extraordinarily positive impact on your and your child’s sense of wellbeing and connectedness; today we are talking about ‘want nothing time’.

What is ‘want nothing time’?

“…when the parent doesn’t want to do anything with the [child], has no plans other than wanting simply to be with the child; just floor sitting, being available, being there with all senses awakened to the child; watching, listening, thinking only of that child…”

 ~ Magda Gerber – Dear Parent: Caring for Infants With Respect

I think so often we feel like we have to ‘do something’ when we are with our children; right, I’ve finished the washing, I’m here now. Let’s do something, when sometimes it is nice just to be with our children, just to sit and watch, play alongside and be there fully in the moment; not wanting anything, just being there.

Creating machines - An Everyday StoryIt can be difficult; being fully there with our children, in body and mind; emptying our mind of all distractions. But when we sit with them, even for fifteen minutes, peacefully, asking nothing of them other than to be in their presence for a while, we are affirming a belief in our child that they are valued; that they are seen, not for what they can do for us in that moment but for who they are.

30 Days to Transform Your Play - Day 14 - Want Nothing Time {from An Everyday Story}Schedule some ‘want nothing time’ in your day. Even if it’s just 15 minutes. 15 minutes to clear your mind of distractions and be fully present with your children.

Further Reading:

Here’s some articles I thought you might enjoy.

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14 Replies to “Want Nothing Time | Day 14 – 30 Days to TYP”

  1. kate – this is perfectly timed! today is the first day of school holidays for us and we already declared it ‘pyjama day’! and now, i will intentionally insert a little ‘want nothing’ time into it. honestly, i find this so challenging to do, as i am used to either coordinating the play/activity, or attending to the infinite to-do list. I need to do a little more just ‘being mindfully present’ and today is the perfect day for that! 🙂 thanks for the encouragement xx

    1. We had a pyjama day on our first day of school holidays too…and possibly the next few days after 🙂 I used to find it really hard too, I was either deciding what we were doing or off doing some cleaning or something. I felt a little guilty just sitting there. But it is such a lovely peaceful time.

  2. This is beautiful! We definitely need more of this in our days. I see it helping with sibling disagreements, among other important things. I will consciously do this more this week – the perfect week (leading up to Easter – I’m planning on doing some extra projects with the boys). Thank you, as always.

    1. Thank you Kaly 🙂 I find the same thing with Jack and Sarah, their little quabbles go away for that time that we are sitting peacefully together. It has become such an important part of our days.

  3. What a wonderful reminder to embrace our children, as they are and to show them we love them, as they are. Thank you Kate. xo P

    1. Thanks Pauline 🙂 Just as they are.

  4. I do ‘want nothing time’ often and I just sit and watch him or join in, but until now I always thought I was being lazy or felt guilty because i wasn’t talking with him or interacting with him as much as I thought I should. It was great to read your post on it.

    1. I used to feel lazy too; like I should be doing something. But I have really let go of that guilt and now really enjoy that time with Jack and Sarah. Enjoy that time with your little man 🙂

  5. Love the Alfie Kohn quote! Great post Kate 🙂

  6. I agree. I love just making myself present without purpose but I need to make more time for it. The other day both kids were in my daughter’s room with the door closed. I went in and sat down on the bed. The kids were getting dressed up and my daughter asked me what I wanted. I said, “Nothing, just came in to hang out.” She gave me a huge hug and said, “I love you, Mum.”
    Showed me just how important it is and how much it means to them.

  7. Lovely piece Kate. A great reminder to all parents to give valuable time to their children and be completely present.

  8. A lovely reminder! My favourite part of the day is just hanging out with my two, usually sitting with them as they play around me, chatting away about anything and everything 🙂

  9. I love this, it is a great one. I do it with my children but not nearly enough. Sometimes my daughter says ‘play with me’ and when I join her I find what she really means is ‘be with me’ as she plays happily on her own with me alongside.

  10. Such an important reminder

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